a story of a horde...

There I was innocently standing there at work ...when suddenly dozens of people begin rushing into the store...Now keep in mind that I can only see the door through a space between the wall and the shelving unit that holds the cordless phones. Some of said phones have security cords attached to them and many times people ask 'are these cordless? I say 'yes that's a security system if you pull it off loud beeping will ensue...' but I digress. Through this small space i could see people rushing into the store. Now the door that I can see I know is the door that goes out. Even though sometimes I get confused and then walk straight into the door cause it doesn't open I still know its the out door. I'm guessing at this point that there are people coming in the 'in' door also... I hear the sound of footsteps and shouting voices... I turn to my co worker who is staring wide eyed in the direction of these people who are now coming around the corner and heading straight for out department. I glance around to see what I could defend my self with if need be and also to find a reason as to why this crowd of people was rushing toward me. The only thing I can find is a screw driver. Of coarse this is the day that I left my knife at home. The knife that has been with me on almost every continent and was almost always in my pocket at school or working at camp was not with me. Today was the one day where I said to my self 'I wont need a knife today' Obviously the screw driver was not the cause of such panic and pandemonium but I could think of nothing that was. We did have a new 'drop proof' digital camera (it's not drop proof as in impossible to drop but its designed to take a 5 foot drop so when you do drop it it will be fine) which brings the total to three (what I wouldn't give to know how to juggle) but that hardly seemed worthy of such a rush of people especially since it wasn't on sale or anything. As they came closer to the counter behind which I stood my coworker was swept up in the crowd and I'm sad to say I never saw him again. It should be obvious to you the beloved reader that I survived this escapade as I am still alive to tell you the story... They were within 3 feet of me the first ones jumping over the counter and coming through the little door we have for the staff, i was in my defense positions other wise known as the curled up in as small as a ball , when suddenly every thing stopped... the clock on the wall the t.v. playing a recent movie and most importantly the angry crowd. I only wondered for a second or two what had happened before my thoughts turned to getting out of there. I also remember in that moment some books I had read once about worst case scenarios that my friend had given me for Christmas. It had advice in it on anything from landing a plane to how to eat for a dollar. Included in between these things was advice on how to survive in a rushing crowd. I figured it i couldn't get out before they came back to motion I would implore those tactics and hope for the best. My way out was chosen because of the lack of availability of regular and conventional routes. The previously mentioned space between the phones and the wall. I quickly climbed on to the shelf and began squeezing my way through. In the process I knocked several phones off the shelf setting of the the security system and the loud beeping ensued. After getting through I ran out the door and into the parking lot...where police cars were parked at odd angles and police men were pointing there guns at me and a helicopter was circling...I put my hands up and followed their instructions to lie face down on the floor. In the police car I tried to explain and was told that they believed me part of the angry mob who the police believed were trying to steal the something of great importance. All i could get out of them was it was a machine since they kept referring to it as 'the machine'. Nothing was said on what it did what it looked like how it ended up in the camera department. Once i got to the police station i was put in a cell with other employees. I was very relieved to see them again and they told me their versions of the story and how they got out of the store. The guy from the c.d. department had seen the mass crowd frozen and had taken the back way out of the store. He was slightly bigger than I am and couldn't fit through the space i had squeezed through. Just as the last person was beginning to tell their specific story then police came in with apologetic looks on their faces...They had apparently realized that we were all employees and not part of a mob. They told us to go home and that they still had our store surrounded. Most of us went back to the store not only to see what was happening but I needed my keys and change of clothes. I did not want to go home to a locked house and stand out side in my dress pants, shirt and tie. When I got there the mob was being moved into police cars and the police were stripping off their riot gear. We were told that we could continue work and would get paid for our time in the police station even though we weren't working. I hadn't taken the time to swipe out when i was running for my life so i felt that was justified. The police had searched the building for this machine and had found it in the camera department disguised as our aforementioned new camera. That explained why the mob had run straight for me. The machine i learned later had several capabilities. It could freeze time and space- like it did and it could also change it shape to defend itself and the people responsible for it. It could also influence people to do certain things like form a mob and rush the camera department. Not exactly mind control but close. My favourite feature was the installing talents feature i still wanted to juggle...a close second was the teleportation- it could teleport people and things where ever they wanted. I never got to play with the camera or 'the machine' as it came to be known but I did find out how it had ended up in my department- some one in our store had stolen it and hidden it there hoping to recover it after the store closed. The best the police and people inventing it could figure was that 'the machine' had caused those people to rush the department- then protected the store employees in order to be found by its makers. Eventually the people were released to go about their normal lives free of urges to start riots. 90% of them came in and apologized to me personally and our store. The thing was that they all came in at the same time and crowded around the counter mumbling their apologies. They were all very impressed with my new found juggling abilities and most of them bought one of the new cameras....

I had said a story would be coming and I came through

-luKe